Cultivating a Heart of Thanks

Psalm 106:1-2 says, "Praise the Lord. Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good, His love endures forever. Who can proclaim the mighty acts of the Lord or fully declare His praise?" When we give thanks to the Lord we proclaim His awesome acts. He is most worthy of our praise and thanksgiving. Thanksgiving promotes not only the glory of God, but humility in us. It is the tendency of the sinful human heart - even the regenerated heart - to usurp credit that rightly belongs only to God. Thanksgiving stimulates our faith. It promotes contentment. I would recommend making a list of things for which you are thankful and make reference to that list frequently. Perhaps the following items would be a good start: your personal salvation, your opportunities for spiritual growth, the availability of the Word of God, the fellowship and instruction of the church, the abundance of helpful Christian books and broadcasts, opportunities for ministry and service, a godly spouse. Paul made frequent statements in his letters, such as, "We always thank God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, when we pray for you." (Colossians 1:3) Later in the same letter he instructs the Colossians, "Devote yourselves to prayer, keeping alert in it with an attitude of thanksgiving." (4:2) As you meditate on these verses, ask God to give you a genuine attitude of thanksgiving. At the Atkins' home we are rejoicing and giving thanks today that the 9th MRI was clear, and showed no harmful development.

Card Carrying Aliens

The Bible contains many designations for believers in Jesus Christ who at one time or another are referred to as "the way," "strangers," "pilgrims," "disciples," "believers," "saints," "members of God's household," "a royal priesthood," "living stones." The one I've been thinking about lately is Peter's designation in 1 Peter 1:1 as "aliens." C. S. Lewis, who I hope to meet someday, said in "Mere Christianity" that we live in occupied territory. That is what this world is. "Christianity is the story of how the rightful King has landed, you might say landed in disguise, and is calling us all to take part in a great campaign of sabotage. When you go to church you are really listening in to the secret wireless from our friends: that is why the enemy is so anxious to prevent us from going. He does it by playing on our conceit and laziness and intellectual snobbery." I remember from reading one of A. W. Tozer's books years ago that one chapter was titled "The World: Playground or Battleground." The recipients of 1 Peter clearly knew that the world was a battleground. As we have noted from "Mere Christianity" Lewis understood that this was enemy occupied territory. Believers need to awaken to the fact that the conflict is real, that the armor is provided and the campaign of sabotage continues. Leading people to Jesus Christ, to be their Savior, discipling men, women, and children and transforming our minds by the Word of God will tilt the battle in Christ's favor and sabotage our adversary.

On a medical note: my 8th MRI is scheduled for Monday. Please pray for a clear. My bilirubin was at 1.6 at the last count 2 weeks ago, and will be tested tomorrow. Thank you for your visit to the blog.

Simple Truths for Young and Old

Tonight during council time at Awana, I reminded the clubbers of several things that I felt were important when facing difficulty and hardship. The first reminder is that we are loved. "Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?" There is NOTHING that shall separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus. The second truth is that we are part of a plan, as Jeremiah 29:11 reminds us: "For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." The third truth is you are never alone. Zephaniah 3:17 states, "The Lord your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love." Of course, the last words in Matthew's gospel are the memorable words of our Savior, who said, "Lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the age." Young or old, well or ill, joyous or despairing, we should remind ourselves daily of these three truths: we are loved, we are part of a plan, we are never alone.

Medical update: Our cup is overflowing with praise to God Who is our Help, our Deliverer, and our Shield, because the 7th MRI results today revealed that the image was clear. All praise, glory and honor to our Heavenly Father for His lovingkindness and help.

Beyond All Measure

Fernando Ortega has a beautiful song with these lyrics,
"How deep the Father's love for us,
How vast beyond all measure,
That He would give His only Son,
To make a wretch His treasure.
How deep the pain of searing loss,
The Father turns His face away,
As wounds which mar the chosen One,
Bring many sons to glory."
Who could ever contemplate or imagine the intimacy of the Father's and Son's relationship? They are one. Who could ever imagine the deep pain of having this relationship interrupted? Maybe a preposition within the original Greek will help us understand better. John 1:1 states, "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God..." The word "with" means face to face. John could have selected a different preposition for the word "with." It is "meta" which means "in the midst of." "Sune" means "in closest association." "Para" means "by the side of" but "pros" means Jesus was facing God the Father, acting with God and acting in closest intimacy and fellowship and communion with God the Father. This was interrupted when "He who knew no sin became sin for us." So when Ortega asks how deep is the Father's love for us, his reply is totally correct in that it is vast beyond all measure. This should elicit praise from the believer without interruption for all eternity.

Acknowledgement and medical update: I wish to thank people who have read my blog faithfully and apologize when I haven't submitted an entry in a timely manner from the previous one. Your prayers also mean the world to me, as my 6th MRI was clear of tumor activity. My 7th MRI is right around the corner and we've asked our Heavenly Father for another clear. I praise God not only for my salvation, but for my saliva, which continues to be a relief to the dry mouth condition. I also praise Him for repair of the liver, as the last bilirubin measurement was 3.7! Enzymes dropped somewhat. Have a blessed and safe Labor Day. Love, Chris, McCook, Nebraska

The Hope Diamond of Scripture

I have been thinking a lot about numbers lately. One of the reasons is the flack that I have been given (in jest) over the Jayhawk jersey of Mario Chalmers hanging in my study. Not too popular in Cornhusker country! So I simply relate the numbers that justify its hanging there. The Rock Chalk Jayhawks have won the national championship in basketball four times. They have been to the final four twelve times. They have won the conference championship 50 times and have had 22 all-American players. When your team can come close to those numbers, I'll hang your jersey up - ha ha! Max Lucado has written a book entitled "3:16 - The Numbers of Hope." Most people that read the blog are familiar with this verse and some of the sharpness of it has worn smooth with familiarity. I challenge you to read it slowly and meditatively, to observe how God loved us. Lucado writes, "He didn't love in order to get something from us, but to give everything of Himself to us," paraphrasing Ephesians 5:2. He knows that our goodness cannot win God's love, nor our badness lose it, but you can resist it. I am simply staggered once more by the awesome reality that God loves. That God gave. That we believe. That we live. The good news of the Gospel of Jesus Christ compels us to take the reality of this verse to those who continue to resist it - the lost. He does not desire people to perish, but to have eternal life.

On a medical note - We thank and praise the Lord daily for 5 clear MRI's and a bilirubin count that reached the single digits - 8.5. Our next MRI is August 17th, and we covet your continued prayers. May God richly bless you.

Attending Worship

Not long ago, the world watched as three gray whales, icebound off Point Barrow, Alaska floated battered and bloody, gasping for breath at a hole in the ice. Their only hope: somehow to be transported five miles past the icepack to open sea.

Rescuers began cutting a string of breathing holes about twenty yards apart in the six-inch ice. For eight days they coaxed the whales from one hole to the next, mile after mile. Along the way, one of the trio vanished and was presumed dead but finally, with the help of Russian icebreakers, two of the whales swam to freedom.

In a way, worship is a string of breathing holes the Lord provides his people. Bruised and battered in a world frozen over with greed, selfishness, and hatred, we rise for air in church, a place to breathe again, to be loved and encouraged, until that day when the Lord forever shatters the ice cap. How is your attendance at worship these days?

On a medical note: the good news to report is that my bili-rubin is now in the single digits at 8.5 and we give thanks and praise to our God for this!!!!!!! My next MRI is scheduled for August 17th. Thank you for all of your prayers and concern.

Venting, Whining and Complaining

Reportedly, we spend a third of our life eating, and a third of our life sleeping. I believe we spend the last third of our life complaining or venting about everyday grievances. When we complain it is with a sense of discontent with people, things or circumstances. We imply that God is not doing His work properly, that if He would only trust us with His work, everything would be solved - and in quicker time, too. Are women the complaining sex? Well, everyone complains, but in one study, when a doctor (female) asked subjects to write down as many personal annoyances as they could come up with, women jotted down nearly four times as many as the men did. I am certain that the Israelites in Numbers 11 were made up of men and women who complained about the absence of fish, cucumbers, melons, onions, garlic and more. God was totally displeased with their attitudes. If you and I are to be blameless sons of God in the midst of a crooked country, we need to take serious God's command in Philippians 2:13 to do all things without murmuring and complaining. Maybe the best antidote is to read Psalm 103 daily until the habit of complaining is broken.

On a health note, blood was drawn today. We are hoping that the results will show continued movement in the right direction in respect to the liver.

Flesh and Spirit in Opposition

I heard some dog owners recently tell their dogs, "Stop barking." This was followed up by further commands such as "stop scratching." Some dog owners lengthen the list with orders to stop chasing. We often tell our own dogs to stop eating solar lights, water sprinkler heads, plants from the greenhouse and more. I have a tendency not to recognize that dogs will be dogs and engage in dog-like behavior. People are the ones created in the image of God and Christians have a new nature and should manifest a different standard of behavior. We don't have to yell at our children with the excuse, "I'm just tired." We don't have to engage in envy with the excuse that I wasn't really coveting those things. Paul states in Galatians 4:17, "For the flesh sets its desire against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; for these are in opposition to one another, so that you may not do the things that you please." We need to rid ourselves of the illusion that personal freedom is the paramount priority. We need to subordinate our fleshly responses to the Spirit-controlled temperament. Believers need to stop making excuses, rationalizations and justifications for wrong behavior. "If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit." (Gal. 5:25)

Medical update: the good news we received today is that my 5th MRI showed no change from those previously - it was clear! We give thanks to God for His loving kindness and answer to our prayers.

Homesick

Music camp, tennis camp, Bible camp. My daughter has had many options this summer for participation in various camps. The most recent camp experience has seen her come down with a case of real homesickness. I remember when I first went off to college suffering terribly as a freshman wanting yet to be back home. When Jesus told the disciples that He was leaving, He also reassured them that He was going to prepare a place for them. (The Greek word actually means "dwelling place" not mansion.) I have had one church member scold me for not using the word mansion that Jesus was preparing for her. Somehow she missed the point of the passage in John 14, that He was going to come and take them home so that they could be where He was. I am hoping and believing that my young daughter is homesick because of her mother and I (ok, her kitty too!) and not because of the big house on the tree-lined street. Are you homesick for heaven? If so, isn't it because of the Father Who dwells there and the Son Who is set to come at any moment? Is it not wonderful that Jesus takes up residence in us now, as He states in verse 20, that "I am in my Father, and you in me, and I in you." I guess heaven will be that place where this reality is not distracted from by all the trappings that surround us now. If you are not homesick for heaven and the Heavenly Father, you may need a spiritual check-up.

Prayer request: elevated bilirubin sure causes a lot of itching. Please pray that it continues to drop along with the liver enzymes so I can get some relief.

Acknowledging Christ in Everything

Many Christians memorized Proverbs 3:5-6 while they were yet children. Yet, we can spend all of our lives somehow escaping the action that we are exhorted to do...acknowledge Him in everything. Roger von Oech in his book "A Kick in the Seat of the Pants," suggests: "Take a look around where you're sitting and find five things that have blue in them. Go ahead and do it. With a "blue" mindset, you'll find that blue jumps out at you: a blue book on the table, a blue pillow on the couch, blue in the painting on the wall, and so on...In like fashion, you've probably noticed that after you buy a new car, you promptly see that make of car everywhere. That's because people find what they are looking for. At times in our lives, God seems strangely absent, but the problem is not that God has disappeared. We simply lack a "God" mindset. When we develop our sensitivity, we soon begin to see his work everywhere." How imperative it is for us to maintain the sensitivity to His presence and work in our lives.

On a medical note: The liver seems to be in a holding pattern presently, with the bilirubin level and enzymes moving up slightly. Please pray that the trend will be reversed again. I wish that there were something I could do to facilitate the liver's self-repair, but since I can't, I cast this constantly at the feet of the Great Physician.

The Greatest Word Uttered

The three words that Jesus spoke in John 19;30 is a single word in the original Greek text, that has been called "the greatest word which ever broke upon the ear of man." Frequently preachers look for a single word or thought to drive a point home with power to the hearer. The one word that Jesus uttered was "tetelestai." This means "It is finished." It is a declaration of victory. It was said to be an artist's word. When the painter had put the finishing touches to the vivid landscape, he would stand back and admire his masterpiece and murmur, "tetelestai." It is impossible here to exhaust it's depths, but we can make some observations. It was a word that indicated suffering was ended. The physical agony and mental anguish now culminated in his death for us. The word also indicates that revelation was finalized. Early in John's gospel we read that "no man has seen God at any time."
In Jesus, God became visible and tangible. In His humanity He interpreted the Father to us. The word also means that shadows became substance. Centuries of sacrifice revealed their insufficiency, but now the perfect sacrifice was offered. Finally, "tetelestai" means: the Father's will was fulfilled, Satan was defeated, and redemption was accomplished. An unknown author stated, "It is finished was His last voice, the sacred accents over. He bowed His head, gave up the ghost, and suffered pain no more." Truly that one word was the greatest word ever uttered.

On a medical note: The last MRI was clear, and showed no tumor activity. We give praise to God for answered prayer!

Jesus and Children

We read in the gospels that the disciples ran interference against young children trying to prevent them from the time and attention of the Master. Jesus quickly reversed their action and invited the children to come close. After a week of Vacation Bible School some of our disciples were ready to send the children away also! There were over 100 each day, and our three and four-year olds numbered close to 40. There were lighter moments, such as when one lad with a cherub face defined who Jesus healed. He healed the blind, who could not see. He healed the mute who could not speak. When asked about the lame he said they were the "totally uncool!" Children must have strongly appealed to Jesus for their honesty of reply and observation. I'm sure He would smile to hear the way the word lame is used in our culture today. We should do everything we can to bring children to Him at an early and tender age.

On a medical note: There is nothing to report concerning the MRI - we are still awaiting the results. However, the bilirubin count is as low as it's been, at 12.5! We rejoice that some enzymes are lower too. We continue to covet your prayers. Love, Chris

Truth and Love

I am neither chemist nor cook, so verification of the following may be necessary. Sodium is an extremely active element found naturally only in combined form. It always links itself to another element. Chlorine, on the other hand, is the poisonous gas that gives bleach its offensive odor. When sodium and chlorine are combined, the result is sodium chloride - common table salt - the substance we use to preserve meat and bring out it's flavor. Love and truth can be like sodium and chlorine. Love without truth can be blind and sentimental and carries a tendency to soften the sharp edges of truth. On the other hand, truth by itself may be overly offensive, sometimes even brutal. Spoken without love it can turn people away from the gospel. When truth and love are combined in an individual or church, then we have what Jesus wants His church to be - the salt of the earth. It is then we are able to preserve and bring out the beauty of our faith. The church and the individuals in it are the repository and pillar of the truth. The love of Christ has been shed abroad in our hearts and therefore we can love as He loved. I don't always keep these two elements in balance, and I know the result is diminished effectiveness. I can only say that I am a work in progress - Christ is not finished with me yet, and I hope to be saltier as time goes by. I hope you will be also.

On a health note: The bilirubin count now stands at 15.7! Our prayer is that the enzymes and bilirubin will continue to fall. The fourth post-surgery MRI is scheduled for Wednesday. Please pray that there will be what is known as a clear report - no new tumor activity. God bless you.

Noisy Small Town

I am amazed at times how a quiet, sleepy, rural community such as McCook can generate so much noise. Certain nights of the week in the summer permit Nascar-like racing at the fairgrounds. Train whistles and connections continually penetrate the night. Late night motorcyclists seem to be gunning their motors to reach their destination. The occasional ambulance and the chimes of several churches waft through the night air. Dogs bark at the alley cats. Psalm 46:10 instructs us to "Be still and know that I am God." It is significant that the Psalm in which the words "be still" occur is filled with noise and commotion. The earth shakes, the waters roar and are troubled, the mountains threaten to tumble into the midst of the sea. The nations rage, the kingdoms are moved and the sound of war is heard throughout the land. Then a voice is heard out of the silence saying, "Be still and know that I am God." Go back sometime and read I Kings 19, where Elijah stands at the entrance of a cave waiting to hear from the Lord and receive His commissioning. The point that I'd like to make is that today, we must listen until our inner ears hear the words of God. When His voice is heard, it will not be as shouting in a stadium of a nervous world. Rather, the reassuring call of One Who said He shall not always strive or cry or speak loudly in the streets. It will be heard plainly enough in the heart, and in the end that is all that matters.

Medical update: We are praising the Lord that my bilirubin level has dropped to 17.2. Enzymes continue to show downward trends as well, many of them nearing normal. I feel some strength returning, as I was able to get the front lawn mowed this week for the first time!

The Nature of True Worship

The archbishop of the Church of Canterbury once stated, "Worship is the oil of the spiritual life. It is to quicken the conscience by the holiness of God, it is to purge the imagination with the beauty of God, it is to devote the will to the purpose of God, it is to open the heart to the love of God. All this is gathered up in adoration, the most selfless emotion which the human nature is capable and the remedy for self-centeredness." There have been occasions as I was leaving the worship service,that I overheard someone say, "I didn't get a lot out of this today." This shows a misunderstanding of what our purpose is in being there, which is to offer up to God "worth-ship" for all that He is and all that He has done. We forget that worship is about God - it is not about us. To worship as the archbishop has suggested and renew our minds with the Word of God would certainly transform us from glory to glory as the apostle Paul noted in one of his letters.

On a medical note, we were glad this week to hear that my bilirubin count went to 19.5, and we would like to see it under 5. All liver enzymes continue to head toward normal. We are giving thanks and praise to God for these lower numbers and we are praying for no tumor activity in the MRI scheduled in early June. Thanks for reading the blog and for your continued prayers.

Absent: A Sense of the Sacred

One of the distinct characteristics and nonetheless disturbing of our age is an absence of the sacred. Many places of worship still have a book in the back of the pew called the sacred hymnal, but few consider the music within "sacred." Paul told Timothy that from a child he had known the sacred scriptures, yet people today treat their Bibles and the reading of it with contemptible casualness. When two young people get married this act was at one time referred to as "sacred matrimony." Now it is considered getting hitched or tying the knot, but is seldom referred to as a sacred and solemn occasion. Worship has become shallow and superficial. God's name is often used in a vain and repetitious way. Kneeling is a posture never taken within the service and that which should command respect is often treated as a triviality. We need today to recapture a sense of that which is sacred. There are subjects and matters that are majestic and we should be "lost in wonder, love, and praise" as the hymnwriter said, instead of having LOST our wonder, love, and praise.

Medical update: the next MRI is scheduled for June 10th. We continue to pray for lower numbers related to bilirubin and liver enzymes. Thank you for all the encouragement you continue to bring our direction.

The Sign That You Follow Christ

In John 13:34-35 Jesus states, "A new command I give you: Love one another as I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another." The sign that you followed Abraham was circumcision. The sign that you followed Moses was keeping the Sabbath. The sign that you followed John the Baptist was that you were baptized. The sign that you follow Jesus Christ is that you love one another. A message that I heard some years ago and using the letters as an acronym, defined love as Listening - what the other person has to say is just as important as what you have to say. The O was for Overlooking - everyone has things in their life that we should look past, and simply love them as they are. V was for Value - we demonstrate love when we affirm the other person's value as one for whom Christ died. The E is simply Expression - that love finds tangible ways to meet needs, show concern, convey encouragement. If love is the sign of a true disciple how vivid is this sign currently in your life? Is it plainly visible for others to see? Or is it distant, unclear, and not much of a sign at all?

Medical note: One of my concerns has been loss of weight, and I am glad to report that after a weight loss of 50 pounds, my weight has stabilized, and in fact I have gained 5 pounds back. Blood work is still done weekly, and the last one showed that enzyme levels are continuing to improve. My saliva is greatly improved, for which I give daily thanks and praise! I continue to counsel, teach, and am scheduled to preach May 24th. As chairman of the National Day of Prayer in our community, which is the first Thursday in May, please join us or a group in your area to pray for our nation on May 8th.

Brief Is Best

Oftentimes the best teachers can say the most by saying the least. Jesus was a master teacher and often spoke in pictures of lilies, foxes, widows, sheep, and other subjects. Dr. Charles Ryrie was known at Dallas Theological Seminary for having that gift. In reading Psalm 28 recently, it struck me that David used two words to describe what the Lord was to him, his shield and his strength. So his response to those two characteristics of the Lord was for his heart to affirm it's trust in Him and confidence...I am helped. It is good to know that amidst so many circumstances, adversaries, and clear opposition, we have a Protector. Our response is simple in that we are to trust and understand we are helped.

Medical update: Bilirubin has come down to 23. Dismissal from Nebraska Medical Center was welcome news. The hospitality of my brother Kevin and his family was graciously enjoyed, but it is good to be back in McCook, back to ministry, back to family, and back to what we love.

Update 04-25

(1) I will praise thee, O LORD, with my whole heart; I will shew forth all thy marvellous works.
(2) I will be glad and rejoice in thee: I will sing praise to thy name, O thou most High. - Psalm 9:1-2
We have some great thing to rejoice in today! Dad is doing much better as the doctors continue to search for answers. His bilirubin levels continue to drop and we are now in the mid 20's. (A long way from the 40's!) He has also been able to eat and get some much needed sleep. Continue to join me in prayer over his body and the doctors wisdom.

On a side note: For those of you that don't live in the great state of Florida, here is what your are missing today :)

Update 04-23

Hello everyone, this is Andrew, Chris and Eunice's middle child. I wanted to take an opportunity to give a short update on how dad is doing and request everyone to spend some time today to pray for them. Dad is on his way to Omaha where he will receive specialized treatment/tests. Although not confirmed, there are signs of Hepactic Encephalpathy- a disorder affecting both the liver and the brain. We are grateful he will be in good hands and have faith God is in complete control.

On a side note: I want to say how amazing it was to meet so many of you this past weekend. It was truly a blessing to see your love and friendship first hand. I am so thankful for each and every one of you. God bless.

Grateful and Humbled

I wrestle with how to say thanks to so many who have done so much in relation to the recent Fernando Ortega concert, the potluck meal after our Sunday morning service, and dozens of acts of kindness. Over the next several days I will try to enumerate some of these but there is always the concern of inadvertently leaving someone out. So forgive me for sometimes being general in my thanks and not as specific as what I would like. Let it be said again that I am extremely grateful for sponsors, donors, gifts and all those that made my biological family so welcome during their time here. Right now, please know that you are greatly loved.

The Torn Veil

It hung there for years. It was beautifully embroidered in blue and purple and scarlet. It was there to keep sinful men out and it was there to enclose God in, in front of His mercy seat. I refer to the veil in the Jewish temple that separated the Holy Place from the Holy of Holies. When Jesus died, suddenly without warning, the veil was torn from top to bottom, as if by a pair of unseen, giant hands. James Stewart states that the torn veil stands for several things: (1) The opening of a road - the offer of a right of way for all who care to travel it. (2) The confirming of a hope - the guarantee of life eternal. (3) It reveals the very heart of God, as if to say, "God loves you" and it is the cross that declares that without ambiguity.

On a medical note: We were thrilled to receive the MRI report today, that it is clear, with no change from last month! Blood work was also done today, but we have not received that report.

That First Easter Sunday Morning

The followers of Jesus have never struck me as the athletic type, but when Mary was told to go tell the disciples that "He is risen, just as He said," John arrived at the tomb with unusual speed. The Bible says that he looked in the empty tomb to see what he could. The verb "to see" is simply one of the most common words in the New Testament. Peter quickly caught him and pretty much barged past him to see what he could. The verb changes here to "thereo" from which we get our word theory, and carries the idea of scrutinizing. John goes in to the tomb further to see the folded linen burial cloth and now he sees "orao," which means to see with understanding, and it becomes clear from the text that he now believes in the resurrection for the first time. In fact, I believe at this point we can say with certainty that John is saved. When the Awana children were asked Wednesday night the significance of the linen cloth being folded, one young lady correctly replied that if someone stole the body they would not take the time to be folding the burial cloth. One of the boys submitted the amusing observation that "Women just don't like to leave things untidy, so they must have folded it!" The joy that swept over the women and the other disciples must have been palpable. I trust that your joy is full this Easter season as we consider His triumph over the grave.

On a medical note - please pray that the MRI this next Tuesday will go well. Issues related to the liver are still frustrating because most enzyme levels remain high, including an 11 point rise in the bilirubin, to 44.1.

Past Time to Stop Fretting

In the April issue of Reader's Digest, the lead article is, "How to Hide Anything" - extra pounds, water stains, passwords, house keys, and believe it or not, worry! Instead of hiding worry, we're much better off to deal with it. It is sinful, self-defeating, unproductive and can be habit-forming. Worry has been defined as "a small trickle of fear that meanders through the mind until it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained." Another has likened it unto shoveling smoke. Psalm 37 gives us the antidote to worry, and that is simple trust in the Lord and waiting patiently for Him. Sounds too basic to be true, doesn't it? But over and over this psalm exhorts the believer not to fret, not to rush into action, but to commit our way to the Lord and let Him work in the situation that we find so disturbing. We are told to commit our way to the Lord which literally means to roll your cares over to God, much like what we are told to do in 1 Peter 5:7. I hope that you and I both can make this the habit of our heart.

Medical note: Continue to pray for liver improvement. I am having an ultrasound on Wednesday to check on possible fluid retention around the liver.

Doctrine Matters

If believers today are not grounded in sound doctrine, they risk the danger of being carried to and fro by every wind of doctrine that comes along. Bad doctrine may be conveyed through a popular book or film or radio broadcast. One of the doctrines today that gets twisted is the atonement of Christ. It is presented in scripture as VICARIOUS - "the satisfaction of justice is intended and accomplished for others, not for Himself." "This cup is the new covenant in my blood which is shed FOR you." (John 6:51) "Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life FOR his friends." (John 15:13) "He delivered Him up FOR us all..." (Romans 8:32) "Christ suffered, the just FOR the unjust..." (I Peter 3:18) So today, new doctrines seem to surface that deny the vicarious atonement or the aspect of Christ's death that He took our penalty. Be alert today to what you read, watch and hear, lest foundational doctrines become muddied.

Medical update: The latest blood work showed that the bilirubin moved down a single point, but we are grateful for any downward trend in that or the liver enzymes. However, enzymes continue to climb, showing that repair has not taken place yet.

Misguided Love

Paul writes in 2 Timothy 3 that in the last days people will be guided by their loves. They are lovers of self, lovers of money and lovers of pleasure. I seem to recall one pastor saying that the love of self is the sewer pipe out of which the rest follows. What we love determines a lot about us, because what we love receives our attention and time, our affection and imagination and our affirmation and praise. In the small letter of 1 John we are instructed not to love the world or the things of the world. The Christian ought to be totally counter-cultural in what he loves. The psalmist says that he loves the testimonies of God exceedingly (Psalm119:167). Some of the reasons he mentions are that the truth produces peace (v. 165), it prevents stumbling (v. 166), it is everlasting (v. 160), and therefore he stands in awe (v. 161), he sings praise 7 times a day (v. 164), and rejoices as one who has found riches (v. 162). As we live in the last days, make certain that your love stays fervent for the Word of God and foreign to the love of self, money, pleasure or what the world offers.

Medically speaking, please continue to pray for a healthy liver, a moist mouth and complete wellness. We are so grateful for support that is so constant. Thank you and God bless you.

Large Lessons From a Small Town

Growing up in a small town in Missouri, I learned the distinctions between justice, mercy and grace. Justice is getting what we do deserve. Frequently, my father was the dispenser of justice as my disobedience received the rod of his correction. Mercy is not getting what we do deserve. Not long after I purchased my first car, another student and I played cat and mouse at night with our lights off. The policeman that pulled me over said that I must have run 10 stop signs, but showed mercy in writing up one ticket. Grace, however, is getting what we do not deserve. The yard work that I did for a business owner downtown was usually sloppy and half finished, yet he not only continued to give me a paycheck, but often attached extra to it. He gave me what I did not deserve. In much larger measure, the Lord Jesus Christ has been rich in mercy toward me and exceedingly abundant in grace. Through Him I have forgiveness of sins, access to the Father, an undefiled inheritance reserved in heaven, a prepared place with Him and much more. "Wonderful grace of Jesus, greater than all my sin. How shall my tongue describe it? Where shall it's praise begin?" I trust you are exulting in that same grace.

Medical news: I met with the oncologist today and received assurance of her strong personal interest and ongoing strategy.

The Father's Tender Drawing

In John 6:44 we read that "Jesus said, No man can come to Me except the Father which hath sent Me draw him." Many years ago a Scottish pastor by the name of George Morrison said that no man is pushed by an almighty arm or with his freedom trampled. It is the drawing of the cross, the drawing of the Father, that God bids the soul to come willingly to Christ. It is natural, it is gentle, and the Father draws, He does not drag. There are three books in the Old Testament which are peculiarly the books of tenderness, three books above all others which contain the wooing idea. The first is the Song of Solomon, the second is the book of Jeremiah, and the third is Hosea, who despite his ruined home had learned the power and pain of love. It is in these three books that the thought of drawing love is found in the Old Testament. "I have loved thee with an everlasting love, therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee." That is the sentiment of the Song of Solomon, Jeremiah and Hosea. That is the idea when Jesus Christ said, "I will draw all men unto me." Oh that we would realize that each day He would draw us to His feet where we could learn of Him and have more intimate communion.

Positive news on the medical front: I had an eye appointment today, and it turns out that vision improvements can be made with prescription glasses! This has given us great reason to rejoice! We're hoping that blood work today will have good results. I meet with the oncologist tomorrow. People continue to be so generous in bringing us wonderfully prepared food suitable for my dry mouth, but enjoyable for the whole family.

Suppliers of Comfort

At the end of the Book of Colossians the Apostle has a list of fellow workers in the Kingdom of God and states, "They have proved a comfort to me." (5:11) The word for comfort that Paul uses is only found in this verse in the New Testament. The word paregoric was used of a medicine that mitigated or alleviated pain. Perhaps Paul's close association and deep admiration for the physician Luke gives reason for the selection of this term. It has been my experience over many months now to have been provided by family and friends a real sense of understanding and sympathy for what I have been through. Frequently they express an interest in me and make wonderful attempts to show understanding. Comfort is supplied and the pain is softened by their presence, prayers, softly spoken words and companionship, much like what Paul experienced from the friends that he lists at the end of Colossians. The world is a place of unexpected pain, but thanks be unto God for family and friends who can be sources of real comfort.

Medical update: The latest blood test was not encouraging, as the bilirubin level rose 5 points, to 38.4, and a liver biopsy is probably to be scheduled soon.

Thanksgiving 24/7

As we travel through life, sometimes the easiest thing is the most non-productive...to focus on the reversals, or how we got a raw deal, or how life isn't fully meeting our expectations. I wish we could have the attitude of a previous century Bible teacher named Matthew Henry, who wrote these words in his diary after being robbed: "Let me be thankful. First, because I was never robbed before. Second, because although they took my wallet, they did not take my life. Third, because although they took my all, it was not much. Fourth, because it was I who was robbed, not I who robbed." (They would not be able to take much out of my wallet either, for the medical community already has!) When the Word of God says to give thanks in everything, I think that Matthew Henry's diary reflects a supreme example in how to do this. I trust that whether you journal or not your habit and mine will be as his.

On a medical note: last week's MRI brought the positive results of no tumor activity. My bilirubin count dropped 2 points, to 33, and any downward movement is greeted with gratitude. I am working to replace some of the 40 pounds that I have lost. A better appetite helps, but with the dry mouth, it is still a challenge. I look forward to preaching both services this Sunday in the pastor's absence from the pulpit and we are also looking forward to the benefit Fernando Ortega concert on April 19th.

It is Coming - One Day Closer

Matthew 24:42 says that we do not know which day our Lord is coming, but that we should be on the alert or "watching." When a scheduled airline arrives in Denver the controller knows all the details about the plane and the various stages in its flight. He knows when it will arrive. On the other hand, a young lady whose fiance is on the flight knows only the approximate time of arrival, but is overjoyed at the prospect of his coming. Wouldn't you agree that it is better to know little about Christ's coming and have a heart full of anticipation than to know specific details and be indifferent. Perhaps this is the difference between watching and waiting. A person watching has a joyful heart that is waiting in hope. All I know is that with the passing of this day we are closer to His return and I hope that finds you waiting in hope with a joyful heart also.

On a medical note, the bilirubin has moved up four points, to 35.4, and as of today, Wednesday, we have not received the results of the MRI brain scan I had done yesterday. We continue to value your prayers for issues pertaining to the liver, the dry mouth and the mind.

Walking With God Then and Now

I was reading in Genesis 5 today, where it tells us twice that Enoch walked with God, and in v. 24 says, "And Enoch walked with God; and he was not for God took him." I remember hearing or reading that at the end of the day, after walking together, Enoch was closer to God's house than his own, so God extended the invitation for him to stay. That is a very wonderful and attractive picture, is it not? Another writer has worded it that Enoch and God were in constant touch with each other. Is that not both a possibility and joy for us, that we can remain in constant touch with our God...today, tomorrow and throughout eternity. It is a great realization to know that what was true of Enoch can be exactly true for every believer. Are you staying in regular or constant touch with the Father?

On a medical note, this next week, Tuesday will be a significant day. Blood work will be done to gauge the level of bilirubin and other liver enzymes and shortly thereafter I will have an MRI of the brain. Sometimes I feel selfish in asking for your continued prayers, yet just knowing that you bring my name before the throne of grace is comforting. We are enjoying these days back at work and with our girls.

Amazing Love - How Can It Be?

Although I cannot say with 100% certainty, Valentine's Day probably has roots in one form of paganism or another. Most of us can nonetheless take the opportunity to show that special person in our life our love and appreciation for them. I suppose the traditional ways are cards and flowers, chocolates, a quiet dinner out together, or some similar expression. Better yet, it does provide opportunity to rehearse aspects of the One Who loved us with a lavish love. I speak of God the Father in giving us His Son. Romans 5:8 indicates that He loved us with an unconditional love. Ephesians 3:18-19 affirms that it is an immeasurable love. Romans 8:38-39 declare to us that it is an inseparable love. Countless verses declare the sacrificial nature of God's love. Perhaps if the Father were sending us a card it would have on the front or inside I John 3:1, "See how great a love the Father has bestowed upon us, that we should be called children of God; and such we are..." I hope that you will give some time to thinking about these or other facets of His love as He has revealed them in His Word.

Medical update: I have been told by the liver specialist my ammonia level in my blood is too high, so medication has been prescribed to reduce it. Next week could be a busy week as we anticipate a meeting with our oncologist in North Platte, and possibly making a trip to Omaha for a second liver biopsy, since the bilirubin level increased to 39.5. Your prayers for dry mouth syndrome are urgently requested. I ask the Father daily to touch my gland so that I may eat and swallow with greater ease. The time that we have been able to be in our own home with our children has been immeasurably meaningful, along with returning to work and worship at MEFC. Our love and God's love to you.

Trusting When There Are No Answers

Ruth Graham Lotz has written a provocative book called "My Heart's Cry." It's subtitle could be "Longing for More of Jesus." The chapters delineate what she means, such as "More of His Tears on My Face," "More of His Courage to My Convictions," "More of His Fruit in My Service," "More of His Praise on My Lips." The chapter that I read today that was of particular help was chapter 11, "More of His Answers To My Prayers." Let me just quote a few lines from that chapter: "Has Jesus done something you don't understand? When have you asked Him to explain? Jesus is not offended by our ignorance or our confusion or our questions. On the contrary, He knows exactly what we are thinking and feeling and He takes the initiative to help us understand, but our understanding is limited. At a time of unanswered prayer in my life years ago, my mother taught me the verses to a hymn that I still quote when I am baffled by events that seem to careen out of the orbit of what I have asked. 'Trust Him when the dark doubts assail thee, Trust Him when thy strength is small, Trust Him when to simply trust Him seems the hardest thing of all; Trust Him! He is ever faithful: Trust Him for His will is best; Trust Him - for the heart of Jesus is the only place of rest.'"

With dry mouth syndrome and liver questions still unanswered, I find myself somewhere in the middle of trusting Him and trying to find answers to my questions and confusion. I wish I could say that my trust was greater. Anyhow, the words to the great hymn of old seem to help me and I hope they help you, too, when faced with your next difficulty.

It is so good to be back in McCook with our two daughters and in our own home. It was exciting to learn yesterday that our church is bringing Fernando Ortega to our civic auditorium as a benefit toward our health expenses, on April 19th. So many have been so gracious and generous to us. We run out of words to say thanks. We covet your continued prayers over the two issues discussed above and will keep you informed as to any progress. In the love of Christ, Chris and Eunice

First Priorities For Final Days

In 1 Peter 4:7 the Lord's disciple states that "the end of all things is near." Truly I am ready for the Lord to come and the church as a whole is to be looking for Him every day. Until He comes, Peter gives us a list of priorities (1 Peter 4:7-11)since we are pilgrims and aliens and this is not our home.

1. The alien's mind - we are to be of sound judgement and sober spirit, for the purpose of prayer. I can't help but think that Jesus' request to Peter to stay alert in the garden is responsible for this admonition. We are to remain on watch and on guard against our spiritual enemy.
2. The pilgrim's heart - keep fervent in your love for one another. I think another way of expressing this would be to remain lavish in your love, or to spend it without sparing expense.
3. The alien's home - I already think of the people at MEFC as being very generous in opening up their homes to other people. This is just a reminder that there is always a need for gracious hospitality.
4. The alien's service - all have received a special gift. We are to utilize it in the service of one another and for the building up of the body of Christ.

The Spirit's enablement can insure that we perform these priorities well. With the end being near, as Peter reminds us, it is more compelling for us to know how we ought to live.

Medical update: I had a sonogram in Omaha today, but we were then able to return home. Pray for the liver specialist as she works to determine the origin and correction of my liver issues.

People Who Are Ready To Be Used By God

I played football in high school, but I was not part of the starting team, which was extremely frustrating. I felt that I was ready to play and was frequently inserted in the second half at the position of defensive end. There are occasions in life when all of us feel frustrated because we are ready to "get in the game" but somehow never manage to. In Romans 1:14-16 we find the disposition of a person who is ready to be used by God. You may read these and focus on the "I am" statements.
1. I am a debtor both to the Greeks and to the barbarians. In other words, Paul was a man for others regardless of class, status, age, gender or standing in society.
2. I am eager to preach the gospel to you who are at Rome. Paul states that he possessed an inner compulsion to reach others, to teach them, and to see the Lord change them.
3. I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ for it is the power of God unto salvation to everyone that believes (1:16). The third quality of this individual is that he is confident that God is at work and that the gospel message is powerful.

Each one of these "I am" statements reveal a characteristic about that man or woman ready to be used by God. May you be that person. During our stay in Dallas, whether we were at the aerobics center or at the mall, I asked God to bring along the path someone who would be a divine appointment, because I was eager to share the good news.

Medical update: I was dismissed from the hospital in Dallas on Saturday and am now in Omaha scheduled to see liver specialists Thursday morning. Please pray that they will be able to determine why my bilirubin level is so elevated.

It All Seems So Simple

I was reading in Matthew 8 today, where Jesus came down from the mountain and the multitudes followed Him. Suddenly standing in front of Him, but then quickly bowing, was a leper. The leper made a simple statement, "Lord, if you be willing you can make me clean." (vs. 3) Then there is the simple response, "Jesus stretched out His hand and touched him saying, 'I am willing; be cleansed.'" The simple conclusion: immediately his leprosy was cleansed, and Jesus gave him some additional instructions. I guess this is my prayer when I wake up and when I lay my head on my pillow at night, a simple one saying, "Lord, if You be willing, you can make me well." I wish His answer and response back to me was as clear and simple as His words and actions to the leper. Even though I haven't heard from the Lord, I have heard from Him "My grace is sufficient for you." (2 Cor. 12:9) Each day I have to draw from that grace because I so desperately want to hear those three simple words: "I am willing."

Medical update: Dry mouth persists, bilirubin and liver remain a mystery. The procedure I had done today did not give us any real clues to the problem, so the diagnosis continues to be toxicity which will be relieved over the next several months.

Anticipating His First Coming

Among my favorite verses is one found in Isaiah 42:3, where it states this about the coming servant, "A bruised reed He will not break and a dimly burning wick He will not extinguish." One of the reasons, no doubt, that the servant of the Lord (Jesus) was anticipated at His first coming was due to the comfort and encouragement He would have for the weak and oppressed. While some might have been looking for a mighty deliverer, I think there were quite a number looking forward to Him because of His gentleness, comfort, and help. In Dallas today, although I completed my last radiation treatment, I still feel like a dimly burning wick. Pray that the next few days I will gain strength and be rid of some of the after effects of the radiation. Tomorrow is another test, an endoscopy, as they explore with a camera exactly what is happening in my pancreatic, liver, and gall bladder region. I covet your prayers concerning this.

The Bottomless Box

Paul marvels in Romans 11 at both the riches of wisdom and knowledge of our God, stating, "How unsearchable are His judgments and unfathomable His ways." Over the years that I have been a believer, and even in more recent days, I put more and more of my unanswered questions into that box, the box of His unsearchable ways. It is simply an admission that I cannot figure things out. There are things that occur in our lives that defy explanation, and no matter how long or how hard we try, there are answers that elude us. We are "out of our depth" when it comes to answering questions such as "Why did this happen?" or "Why didn't this happen in a different way?" When it comes to trials, I know certain things are revealed to us from the Word of God about why they occur...to produce endurance...to refine our faith...to discipline us...and more. But more often than not, our circumstances defy explanation, and God's ways remain unfathomable. But isn't this when the component of faith becomes operative? Look at Hebrews 11 and check to see if those listed in the Hall of Faith stepped out in trust even when they did not understand. Many of the things that happen in our lives are not tagged with an explanation as to why they are happening. Maybe God one day will take that box and say, "Let me show you My purpose in this event or this trial in your life in 2009, but if not, and meanwhile, we continue to walk by faith.

Medical update: Bilirubin levels are still way too high, and we did not get to finish radiation today due to ice. Thursday should be the last treatment, followed by a scope to look down my esophagus and investigate the cause of the severe pain. Strep tests were negative.

Blog On Pause - Sort Of

I'll start with the medical news tonight. Weather permitting and God willing I have one more radiology treatment tomorrow. My oncologist has recommended that later in the day I transfer to a hospital in Ft. Worth where an endoscopy can see whether I have any blockages in certain pathways that don't allow the bilirubin levels to come down. I covet your prayers for this procedure, as well as the dry mouth condition which continues. My inability to eat has been complicated by the addition of a severe sore throat. They have also discovered an irregular rhythm in my heart which they need to investigate further. I am greatly appreciative for doctors and drugs and technology, but realize my ultimate healer is the Lord. Please pray Psalm 40:11 on my behalf: "You, O Lord, will not withhold Your compassion from me; Your lovingkindness and Your truth will continually preserve me."

Separating Fact From Fiction

Years ago I remember reading a book on the life of Joseph called "From the Pit to the Pinnacle." Sometimes you feel like you've been in the pit a long time. In my situation as a hospital patient results are long in coming, the days are long in passing and sometimes the Lord's presence seems distant, removed, or negligible. I was encouraged today to read from Genesis 28:15 when God spoke to Jacob in a dream (even with a stone as a pillow), "I am with you and will keep you wherever you go." Later in the book we read Joseph was falsely accused, but "the Lord was with Joseph and extended kindness to him." (Genesis 39:21) If you are tempted like I have been to think that the Lord has withdrawn, come back to the pages of Scripture for an adjustment in truth and reality. Our situation, our feelings, our doubts, may cause us to think otherwise, but the Lord is with us even if it doesn't feel like it. Jesus Himself said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you." These are comforting words for challenging days.

Medical update: The specialists are in ongoing discussions as to the cause of the high bilirubin and the appropriate plan of action. The count has not come down noticeably. The last two radiation treatments will be Tuesday and Wednesday if not prevented by the expected ice storm. Please pray for God's timing in leaving here, and for agreement as to the best treatment.

Praying For Him Despite Our Differences

Paul writes in I Timothy 2:1, "First of all, then, I urge that entreaties and prayers, petitions and thanksgivings be made on behalf of all men, for kings and all those that are in authority, so that we may lead a tranquil and quiet life in all godliness and dignity." I was not able to take in any of the inaugural festivities, due to matters here in the hospital. This will not keep me, however, from praying for President Obama, and I urge you to do as much. One of the best reasons to do so is because we are exhorted to this task by the Lord Jesus Christ in His Word. Second, the decisions that he makes will ultimately have ramifications for us. Third, because the passage highlights those who are in authority, it would seem to indicate something of a spiritual battle is taking place beyond the oval office. We want our president and our government to enact laws and establish justice on the basis of moral principles derived from God's Word. By God's grace, I will lift President Obama before the throne of grace on a daily basis. I am sure we will each maintain separate positions on the moral issues. Nonetheless, I want God to guide our nation even if His hand is unrecognized by the president and those around him.

Medical update: After seeing the oncologist this evening, she is not satisfied with the diagnosis on my liver, and will be consulting with the specialist Monday to determine our further course of action. Three radiation treatments remain, so by God's grace, they will be complete Wednesday, and we will be able to say, "That is DONE!" Please pray for the liver results to be more clear, for healing of the dry mouth condition, and that I will be able to eat. I cannot be released until I can support myself with enough nutrition daily.

Unrestrained Praise

For the longest time after I came to faith in Christ, my worship was reserved (half-hearted), polite, and detached. Anybody around me that raised their hands a lot, whether for clapping or only raised high in the air, was viewed as something close to an extremist or simply as an over-emotional person. From now on, I'm taking my orders and fulfilling my desire through the exhortation of the psalmist who instructs us "Clap your hands all peoples, shout to God with a voice of joy." (Psalm 47:1) We all need to forget what others may think about us and bring "worthship" to God with our voices, our raised hands, clapping hands and yielded heart. True worship needs to be free and spontaneous, not scripted and restrained. So next time you see someone truly celebrating God's Person and His deeds in our worship service by use of their hands, don't give them a puzzled look, encourage them. Maybe the rest of us will be ignited by their flame.

Medical update: Radiation has taken its toll on my red and white blood count. I will be receiving some blood this evening. They will have to have a restraining order to keep me from reaching home next week!

Hearts as Big as the State of Texas

My reading today was from a small book, comparatively speaking, in the N.T. There is a slim cast of characters, but quite an interesting drama. Onesimus, a slave, has run away from his master, Philemon, a man of means, and apparently crossed paths with the Apostle Paul, through whom he embraced the gospel. Paul wants to be a bridge to reconnect the two men. Love is all over the pages of this short epistle.
1. Paul has heard of Philemon's love for the Lord and all the saints.
2. Paul's love is evident in his entire approach to a touchy situation.
3. Not wanting to use apostolic authority, he uses gracious appeal to Philemon to accept Onesimus back.
4. The love of Onesimus is demonstrated in that he brought refreshment to the hearts of all the saints.
5. The last indication of love is Paul's willingness to incur any expense that Philemon might be out for the period in which he was a fugitive.
I am certain that as you read this very short epistle you will sense and detect, like I did, how love reveals itself in concrete ways. Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, Who paid in full the great cost of our own personal sin. May the love of Christ be the springboard from which our words and works proceed.

Medical news: We finally received some words of encouragement today. Results of the liver biopsy indicate a high probability that medications were at fault. The doctor believes we were able to catch it in time, and no permanent damage will be done. He is unable to say how long it will take to reverse, but we should begin to see improvement eventually. Even though bilirubin levels remain elevated, it should not prevent us from being able to head home once radiation is completed next week.

The Christian's Motto - "We Aim To Please"

The Scriptures commonly condemn "men-pleasers," while we are commanded to be God-
pleasers. (I Thess. 4:1) You can see in various households certain children who seem eager to please their parents by prompt compliance to directives, by carrying out tasks with a positive attitude, and an overall satisfaction that submission to authority is a positive thing. I wanted to supply you this evening with some additional ways the Bible says we as children may please our Heavenly Father (List compiled by David Hocking):

1. By exalting Jesus Christ, His Son (Matt. 3:17; Col. 1:15-19)

2. By proclaiming the message of the cross (I Cor. 1:18-2:5)

3. By believing in God and his promises (Heb. 11:6)

4. By asking for wisdom (1 Kings 3:10, Col. 1:9-14; James 1:5-8)

5. By staying away from sexual sin (Eph. 5:3,4,10; 1 Thess. 4:1-8)

6. By sharing the gospel with unbelievers (I Cor. 9:14-27, 10:31-33)

7. By giving to others in time of need (Phil. 4:10-20; Heb. 13:16)

8. By submitting to authority (Rom. 8:7-8, Col. 3:20; 1 John 3:22)

9. By praising God for all things (Ps. 69:30-31; Heb. 13:15-16)

The Scriptures say we must become as children to enter the Kingdom of God. Better yet, why not become as children who are eager to please the Heavenly Father.


Health Update: bilirubin continued to rise, while strength decreases. There is much pain from the biopsy, making it difficult to breath. Additional testing is scheduled for Friday.

Praise: Always in Season for Hundreds of Reasons

The Psalmist in Psalm 145 rallies his whole being to vigilance as it pertains to praising the Lord. I would imagine that if we spent more time focused on His perfections and excellent attributes it would have a tremendous effect in shaping our own perspective on ourselves and what we are currently going through. Spend some time re-reading this majestic Psalm, and with paper and pen close by, enumerate all the reasons why David is so determined to make praising the Lord his primary occupation. With each successive day, add something to the list. Before long you will discover that there are infinite reasons to praise Him, because He is an infinite God. This will also eliminate a number of more trivial things that currently take up your time and attention. Praise is always in season and appropriate for hundreds of reasons.

Today was a busy day in the hospital, with the completion of another radiation treatment, an EEG to determine if there is any seizure activity, and a liver biopsy. Doctors are still scratching their heads as to the cause of the bilirubin elevation.

Somebody Pinch Me Please

The phone calls rolled in like the waves of a gentle surf. One of my boys shared how an investor came on board with his company to the tune of nearly 12 million dollars. Another boy called and was excited to be selected to do some artwork for the Jacksonville Zoo. Our 5th grade girl called, reporting of straight A's on her report card. Parents long to hear of their children's success and progress. The greatest phone call that a Christian parent could receive is found in the short epistle of Third John, where the beloved disciple writes, "I have no greater joy than this, to hear of my children walking in the truth." Just prior to this he spoke of the substance of his prayer for his children, "I pray that in all respects you prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers. For I was very glad when brethren came and testified to your truth, that is, how you are walking in the truth." We all want to see our children become successful and prosperous in multiple areas. But the bottom line for me as a parent and as a pastor is to know that "my children" are walking in the truth. When I hear that they are, my joy is off the charts and my mouth says, "Somebody pinch me please."

Please pray that God will make clear to the physicians treating me why my bilirubin count is so elevated. Even after radiation is completed, they do not wish to send home a patient with questionable liver function.

MEFC's Many Ministers

It is possible for guests, when they attend our church service, to conclude that MEFC has three ministers. They may have looked at the graphics on the door or the Sunday a.m. bulletin, or just asked around. The truth is that MEFC has over 300 ministers. Not salaried, not full-time, but ministers none the less. The three that are full-time pastors are essentially "equippers." The term equippers was used of the disciples as they "repaired" their nets to return to the task. As an equipper, we are to assist the 300+ "gifted" ministers build up the body of Christ. Whoa! What a role you play in your giving, your acts of mercy, your teaching, your serving, and much more. Check out Romans 12, I Corinthians 12, Ephesians 3, I Peter 4:10-11, where the lists of gifts are recorded, and see which one matches your desire to employ it to serve others. The next time someone asks you, "How many ministers does MEFC have?" you can truthfully say, "Over 300!" Now get busy.

Health note: I have 7 days of radiology remaining. By God's grace, I will be on a plane that final day, along with the love of my life. I am still in Medical City Hospital as they try to solve the mystery of an elevated bilirubin count.

New Heaven - New Earth - Just Ahead

Can you imagine driving down the interstate and seeing these words, "New Heaven - New Earth - Just Ahead" posted on a sign off the shoulder of the road? These are among the most encouraging words of Scripture, found in Rev. 21:1-6. They are so encouraging because of the "no mores" (what is excluded) and the "lots mores" (what is included) in the new heavens and new earth. With great anticipation we can look forward to breathtaking brilliance, breathtaking beauty, and the Bridegroom's presence (mentioned two times in verse 3). The things that are excluded include death, mourning, crying and pain, as we read that the first things have passed away. I hope that you continue to hold things loosely down here as we anticipate the new things there...not just beauty, not just brilliance, but the Bridegroom who loved us and gave Himself for us (Eph. 5:25), and whose presence will never leave us. No wonder Paul wrote to believers to set their minds on things that are above. I trust that you are doing so with each passing day.

My radiation treatments, of which I have eight remaining, resume Monday. We have not been dismissed from the hospital yet, but were able to obtain permission to leave for an hour. CT scan results were encouraging in that they did not see any clear difficulty, so no surgery is being scheduled. Please pray for improvement in ongoing tests.

Solution to Self Pity

God has a way of quickly terminating self pity, when you think your personal troubles are at the summit and exceed everyone else's. My own troubles have a different perspective because I have looked through the lenses of a friend of the Svoboda family, Jan Wheeler (multiple severe health problems); through the many surgeries of the Rowe children; through the woman who suffered twelve years from a hemorrhage (Mark 6:26). I used to, with tongue in cheek, state that this verse was a current commentary on our own medical community, for it states that she had suffered much at the hands of many physicians, and had spent all that she had, and was not helped at all, but rather had grown worse. But the point of the story is centered on her faith and the Great Physician, as she reached out to touch His garment. He is still the Great Physician and my faith awaits His reaching out and touching me, and healing me.

Please pray that my bilirubin level and other high levels of enzymes will normalize. We had an unexpected CT scan today and hope that it supplies the physician with precise knowledge of how to proceed.

Beauty and Beyond

The wisest man who ever lived, and the wealthiest in his day, knew from observation and experience some things were extremely rare. He wasn't talking about fine art, unique jewelry, or exceptional coins. He was speaking of that rare find of an excellent wife. The rhetorical question that Proverbs 31 begins with serves primarily to emphasize you may be looking a long time. Solomon points out that her value will be far above jewels. He doesn't say above the price of jewels, or just above the price of jewels, but far above the price of jewels. In other words, she is priceless. Thirty years ago come August the woman that Solomon speaks of was brought face to face with me, and I can't claim any credit for finding her. By God's grace I will have another thirty years with her. While time and space don't permit me to elaborate on the whole passage or provide illustrations of how my "treasure" fits these verses, let me just underscore verse 11, which states that the "heart of her husband trusts her." Verse 30 states that "many daughters have done nobly but you excel them all." I can see Solomon and myself going head to head over whose rare find came out on top. I think that I did. The Lord already knew that I felt this way about His gift to me. I just wanted you to know also. (Let me say congratulations to my brother-in-law Mike who marks his own rare find 25 years ago this week.)

Continue to pray that my liver enzyme count comes down. I am happy to have completed the first round of chemotherapy.

What Time Is It?

8 o'clock...9 o'clock...10 o'clock...we're waiting for the MRI that is scheduled for 11 a.m. No food or water again. A CT scan to follow...no food or water before that either. 11 o'clock... 12 o'clock...1 o'clock. Still no MRI. We got bumped down on the schedule by someone that came in to ER. Then we'll wait for the doctor to get the report, and wait for the consultation with her. The waiting game is exhausting and nerve-wracking. You know what I mean, because you've been in that "waiting room" before, haven't you? As I was reading Psalm 25 this morning, verse 5 jumped right off the page. "Lead me in your truth and teach me, for You are the God of my salvation; FOR YOU I WAIT ALL THE DAY." No wonder this is so exhausting - I'm waiting on the wrong thing. I'm waiting on tests and reports and doctors. God invites me to wait on Him instead.

I have to ask myself - what's the difference? The clock ticks at the same speed either way. How will the change in focus affect me? The answer soon became obvious. As I wait on tests and reports and man I am anxious. (Will they be late again? Will it be bad news? How much longer?) In contrast, Psalm 27:14 says, "Wait for the Lord; Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord." When waiting on the Lord we don't develop fear, but strength and courage. He won't be late, He will be enough, He has it all under His mighty hand.

Tonight we're still waiting. The reports are not in, the mysteries are still unsolved. Again tomorrow we'll wait...this time on the Lord. It won't come naturally.

Job's Friends?? (An oxymoron?)

I cannot imagine enduring a hard and lengthy trial without the comfort and encouragement of friends, especially our friends back in McCook, Nebraska. So it strikes me funny how Job had a different perspective of his companions. They must have been close at one time, but as the book unfolds they have become repetitious - "I have heard many such things" (16:1). They have become thoughtless - "There is no limit to empty words" (16:2). We do know from the reading of the book that they were certainly contentious. What is Job's conclusion? "Sorry comforters are you all!" (16:2). While comfort often involves the use of words, I have often thought Job's friends would have rendered him a greater service by their quiet presence than their verbal jousting. Can we remember that simply in our showing up when our friends are hurting we show our love and care and concern? I thank all of you who have written notes on your cards, for choosing and using the right words to minister God's grace to us. They are like "apples of gold in settings of silver" (Prov. 25:11) whatever that means, but it must be pretty! It is obviously impractical for most of you to be here physically, but so many have found a way to "show up" through a card, e-mail, gift, or phone call. You all are sensational comforters!

We are awaiting the results of a liver test. Pray that this will be a positive report. Lungs seem to be functioning better. We are hoping to resume radiology on Monday.

High Octane Worship

I often wonder when I think of how the angels in heaven worship our great God, if He doesn't think that our worship is rather feeble. Four times in Scripture we read about the beauty of His holiness: I Chronicles 16:29, 2 Chronicles 20:21, Psalm 29:2, Psalm 96:9. When we read about His holiness it is typically repeated three times, "Holy, holy, holy" (Isaiah 6). This is the Hebrew writer's way of expressing a superlative. In the English language we use the terms good, better, best. We often say, "That was the best piece of pie I have ever eaten." We might get asked, "Even better than the last one that I made?" When the authors of Scripture wanted to make a strong point, it was through repetition. So think about this phrase as it refers to our God: the beauty of His holiness. Beauty is something that commands and invites attention. Sometimes it might even be flawless. That is the great thing about the infinite God that we worship - He is majestic and beautiful in holiness and we could learn something from the angelic creation by affirming it constantly and maintaining the correct posture while doing so. I am convinced that God wants us to see and enjoy His superlative beauty.

In respect to health, please pray for continued stamina and a good outcome for a liver test tomorrow. Join us in thanking God that I am out of ICU and into a private room.

Are You Hungry?

With the acquisition of pneumonia there has been a suspension of physical appetite. I have very little interest in eating, no matter what is on the tray they set before me. There are times I want to say, "Don't even take the lid off - just take it back to the kitchen." It reminds me of an illustration that Howard Hendricks used to share in his class on Bible Study Methods. He said, "Show me a baby with no appetite and I'll show you a sick baby." He quickly transferred this metaphor into a spiritual lesson. Jesus said in Matthew 5:6, "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness for they shall be satisfied." I never could really understand how believers could keep from craving the Word of God, the knowledge of the Most High, the participation in a banquet of truth. The Beatitudes affirm both blessing and satisfaction to the one who has the strong appetite for the things of God. I believe that the greatest enjoyment in having the strong appetite for the things of God is to have His presence at the banquet table with us. "O taste and see that the Lord is good" and then watch your appetite grow from there.

Medical news - treatment for pneumonia continues in ICU and we hope it is soon completed so we can resume radiology. Test results were encouraging - I am getting better! We hope to move to a regular room tomorrow, and the doctor said I will be there the rest of the week. This does postpone our return to the end of the month.

Please pray for MEFC's participants in the Holy Land trip that starts tomorrow and goes for the next 10 days.

Summary

If asked to summarize my time here in one word, I've been thinking what that would be. The first one would be grace. The other (more human) terms might be lengthy, or fearful. But if I could do it in one verse, I would select this stanza:
Through many dangers, toils and snares I have already come;
Tis grace hath brought me safe thus far and grace will lead me home.

If you haven't yet, please you-tube Phillips, Craig and Dean, "His Grace Still Amazes Me."

Yours because of His infinite, matchless grace,
Chris

Chris sends this from ICU:
In the time before a procedure, when they do not allow you to have food and water, my thirst becomes so intense it becomes nearly unbearable. This quickly takes me to the passage where Jesus cries out "I thirst." We should translate our experiences to biblical meditations. It made me realize how great His thirst must have been during His passion (sufferings), all to give us the freeness, the fullness, the satisfaction of living water. The Psalmist also speaks of the depths of His sufferings in these words which relate to thirst: "My strength is dried up like a potsherd, and my tongue cleaves to My jaws." (Psalm 22:15) Just as Jesus invited the Samaritan woman to experience the living water, the body of Christ must continue that task. That is why we remain here on planet earth, as well as to give Him praise for so great a salvation.

I am requesting friends that read my blog to pray for my many friends taking the trip to Israel on the 13th. Although it was my intent to conduct the trip, I will join you in requesting journey mercies and the Lord's watch care.

Today I had an echo cardiogram and a scope of my lungs, and we are awaiting results from each. Antibiotics have assisted in freer breathing.

A Good Day

Chris asked me to give you a medical update on his behalf. He really has not had a good night's rest since the blood clot incident, but last night was particularly difficult. He woke up with severe nausea, the first since starting treatment, and had fever, shortness of breath, and general misery. We had an appointment for blood work today (which again was OK), but the doctor was concerned about his symptoms, particularly the very low oxygen count, so sent us directly to ER. At this point he has been diagnosed with pneumonia, but they are going to continue testing as to the type, and hope to rule out anything heart related. He is presently in intensive care awaiting a scope of his lungs for further diagnosis. He asks your prayers that the antibiotic will take effect quickly, and that he will be able to rest. He describes himself as "battle worn," as you can imagine, from the seriousness of the condition and treatments to the lack of rest.

Our conversation in the evening often ends with "This was a good day!" That usually means there were no new catastrophes! Things went according to plan, we enjoyed each other, our meals, and being able to check another treatment off the calendar. Have you ever thought about what makes a good day? In I Peter 1:6 we are told, "In this you GREATLY REJOICE, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials..." In meditating on this passage this week I am challenged that the great rejoicing is not when the trial is over - it's during the trial. Why? We don't always remember this, but it is because of the greatness of our inheritance reserved in heaven, and the proof of our faith that will result in praise and glory and honor for the Lord someday. A good day doesn't have to depend on good circumstances or absence of pain. I don't have to measure this day in terms of the present difficulty, I can choose to measure it by future glory, or the delightful presence of the Lord right now. Today my precious husband is in ICU, awaiting further testing, and it feels like a definite setback. But the truth is, it was a good day, because we experienced God's presence, His peace and comfort, His love, and His power working in us. Did you have a good day?

Thinking Outside the Box (Yourself)

In my quiet time this morning, I was reminded of one of the believer's subtle and restless enemies - the flesh. Paul writes, "Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves." (Phil. 2:3) This enemy is not something that can be remedied through nearby doctors or special medication. I have discovered that with my medical condition and the length of time we've been on the healing path, I've had time to refine my own tendency toward self interest and excuse it away too. The thermostat should be placed at the temperature I desire. The ice chips in my hospital cup must be at a certain level. If I'm more comfortable at night with a light on, it must stay on. Where we eat breakfast, lunch or dinner can be decided by me on a whim. If I need the computer or the cell phone at a certain time, then because of "my condition" I gain an edge over these items. Over the years, we've all heard people say, "If I don't look out for #1 (meaning themselves) no one else will." Actually Jesus Christ was completely devoid of seeking His own interests, and the Spirit-filled believer, in the same fashion, will not regard his own interests more important than others, but has other people's concerns and cares high on the list of prayer and assistance. If you need two solid examples of this type of humility and divestment of self interest, you need to only look as far as Jesus Christ (Phil. 2:5-8) and Timothy (Phil. 2:20). May the Spirit of God that indwells us also humble us and cause us to yield to the Word and the admonition here to think outside of the box (ourselves).

Medical update: 8 radiology treatments left, and an oncologist in North Platte who travels to McCook has been referred. I attended an early lecture this morning by Dr. Kenneth Cooper, founder of the Cooper Aerobics Center and who was "tapped" one time by President Bush for the office of surgeon general. He was an encyclopedia of knowledge on nutrition, exercise, heart and body health, and much more. He is a man of faith who attends Prestonwood Baptist Church, and very gracious in answering questions as they relate to nutrition for someone on chemotherapy. Just a footnote - Americans need terribly to raise their level of Vitamin D and Omega 3's. Regarding servings of fruits and veggies he stated quite memorably, "5 servings a day is fine, but 9 is divine." Thank you for reading these ramblings.

Our love to you - Chris and Eunice

Table Top (Radiology) Prayer

In my daily radiology treatments I send a prayer to God based on Colossians 1:15, "For by Him all things were created, both in heaven and earth, visible and invisible." My invisible spirit and soul were created by Him, and my increasingly visible body, and thousands upon thousands of invisible cells that make up my body. My simple prayer to God during treatment is that He would direct these invisible beams of light to every cell in my brain that is harmful or counterproductive to good health. I pray that God would cause the treatment to eliminate, destroy, and eradicate any and all cancer cells that would subvert the purpose for which I was created...to love...serve...and glorify Him. As you continue to pray for me, this would be a specific way in which our great God could apply His great power to a specific need.

We were greeted with a surprise ice storm yesterday that knocked out the power to 48,000 homes, including the Lodge where we are staying. After several hours, we packed up to go to my sister's home for the night. The power outage also kept me from adding to the blog, which I love to do. In our treatment countdown, only 9 remain, and 8 days of chemotherapy. Both radiology and chemo have begun to sap me of energy and increase my fatigue level. Please add this concern to your prayers.

Bargain Souvenirs and Buckets of Praise

Continued medical treatment keeps me from participating in a Holy Land trip that I organized and that will be leaving shortly. I read an article on how members of the trip could bring home an inexpensive souvenir. There is a stopping point for tourists near the Mt. of Olives, which is popular for a group photo or camel ride and near this spot our Lord passed by on a lowly burrow. The writer suggests that you pocket an ordinary stone to take home, and display it with a note that says, "One of the stones that didn't cry out." This is in reference to Luke 19:35-40 and is referred to as the Triumphant Entry of Jesus into Jerusalem. Jesus was told to rebuke His disciples as they shouted the words from Psalm 118 (though they left out verse 22, which reads, "The stone which the builders rejected has become the chief cornerstone.") Most of the Pharisees were frustrated with this display of praise and were wanting Jesus to tone down the crowd, essentially saying "These men are calling you the king of Israel." Jesus approved their words and accepted their praise, adding that if His followers became silent, the very stones would cry out. So pilgrims, collect your stone, and offer Him buckets of praise, because that is what all of creation does (i.e. sun, moon, stars, waters, mountains, cedars, fruit trees, fire, snow, clouds - Psalm 148).

We look forward to seeing you soon, but in the meantime, and the in-between time, offer Jesus your wholehearted, full-throated praise, for He is supremely worth of it all.

How to Pray and Not Lose Heart

My path literally crossed with a lawyer's today. In our visit he made a jab at his own profession. He said a doctor and a lawyer simultaneously fell into a shark tank, but the attorney was left alone due to professional courtesy! There is a parable found in Luke 18 about a judge who exhibits shark-like sensitivity to a widow in need. He is a hard-boiled, self-centered, unsympathetic old codger who contrasts vividly with our caring Heavenly Father. Unlike the unsympathetic judge, our Heavenly Father does not turn a deaf ear to our prayer requests. He does not drag His heels. Our glorious God requires no picket lines, pestering or harassment. We should not lose heart in prayer when we realize that it is laying hold of the eagerness of God to help and bless us. Matthew's gospel succinctly reminds us, "Ask, and it shall be given to you; seek, and you shall find; knock, and it shall be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it shall be opened." In verse 11 we read, "If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him!" May the assurance of these verses cause you to continue in prayer and not lose heart.

To Be or Not To Be...Useful, Fruitful, Faithful

John Bunyan wrote what is regarded as one of the most significant works in literature years ago, and that book, Pilgrim's Progress, is published and read unto this day. PROGRESS is what the Christian life is all about, while avoiding the things which entangle us (2 Tim. 2:4), the sins which beset us (Heb. 12:1), and the cares that distract us (Matt. 6:25). Following salvation many believers seem to select a button that puts the Christian life on auto-pilot (passivity). It would be more preferable to use the manual controls (diligent activity) and have a work out plan routinely scheduled. Peter encourages this last approach where he exhorts us to add to our faith, knowledge, to our knowledge, self-control, to self-control, perseverance, and onto that godliness, brotherly-kindness and love (2 Peter 1:6-11). Adding these qualities to your faith insures us that we will be useful (vs. 8), fruitful (vs. 8), and faithful (vs. 10). One added bonus is the plentiful entrance into the kingdom of our Lord. What will it be for you? Auto-pilot (passivity) or diligent activity? Please keep up the good PROGRESS and momentum.

Frequently I am asked how I am feeling, so let me be candid. The path is long, the hurdles at times are high, yet His grace is sufficient, His presence is near and His love is never ending. Our goal remains unchanged, which is to be home just after the middle of January. Out of 30 radiation treatments, I have 11 left, and 12 days of chemotherapy left. I am hoping to continue my chemotherapy in Nebraska under a neuro oncologist supervised by my doctor here. James Taylor, Jim Ladd and I will be sharing similar hairstyles, or the lack thereof!

Beauty, Majesty and Glory Up Close

Since our little Bethany has been in Dallas for over a week, she has patiently sat in doctor's offices during several of my treatments, sometimes for hours. We decided to do something special for her on New Year's Day, so Eunice drove us all to the Dallas World Aquarium. Although my antennae don't receive all the signals clearly, the beauty and majesty of our God and His handiwork were clearly on display. Paul states in Romans, that the invisible things of God, namely His power and His deity, are clearly evident through His creation. So from penguin to pelican, piranha to anaconda, otters to owls, myna to manatee, stork to stingray, tortoise to toucan, we marvelled at the variety, the creativity, the beauty, the individuality, i.e., the handiwork of God. Indeed, all of nature is an eloquent symphony to His glory.