It All Seems So Simple

I was reading in Matthew 8 today, where Jesus came down from the mountain and the multitudes followed Him. Suddenly standing in front of Him, but then quickly bowing, was a leper. The leper made a simple statement, "Lord, if you be willing you can make me clean." (vs. 3) Then there is the simple response, "Jesus stretched out His hand and touched him saying, 'I am willing; be cleansed.'" The simple conclusion: immediately his leprosy was cleansed, and Jesus gave him some additional instructions. I guess this is my prayer when I wake up and when I lay my head on my pillow at night, a simple one saying, "Lord, if You be willing, you can make me well." I wish His answer and response back to me was as clear and simple as His words and actions to the leper. Even though I haven't heard from the Lord, I have heard from Him "My grace is sufficient for you." (2 Cor. 12:9) Each day I have to draw from that grace because I so desperately want to hear those three simple words: "I am willing."

Medical update: Dry mouth persists, bilirubin and liver remain a mystery. The procedure I had done today did not give us any real clues to the problem, so the diagnosis continues to be toxicity which will be relieved over the next several months.

Anticipating His First Coming

Among my favorite verses is one found in Isaiah 42:3, where it states this about the coming servant, "A bruised reed He will not break and a dimly burning wick He will not extinguish." One of the reasons, no doubt, that the servant of the Lord (Jesus) was anticipated at His first coming was due to the comfort and encouragement He would have for the weak and oppressed. While some might have been looking for a mighty deliverer, I think there were quite a number looking forward to Him because of His gentleness, comfort, and help. In Dallas today, although I completed my last radiation treatment, I still feel like a dimly burning wick. Pray that the next few days I will gain strength and be rid of some of the after effects of the radiation. Tomorrow is another test, an endoscopy, as they explore with a camera exactly what is happening in my pancreatic, liver, and gall bladder region. I covet your prayers concerning this.

The Bottomless Box

Paul marvels in Romans 11 at both the riches of wisdom and knowledge of our God, stating, "How unsearchable are His judgments and unfathomable His ways." Over the years that I have been a believer, and even in more recent days, I put more and more of my unanswered questions into that box, the box of His unsearchable ways. It is simply an admission that I cannot figure things out. There are things that occur in our lives that defy explanation, and no matter how long or how hard we try, there are answers that elude us. We are "out of our depth" when it comes to answering questions such as "Why did this happen?" or "Why didn't this happen in a different way?" When it comes to trials, I know certain things are revealed to us from the Word of God about why they occur...to produce endurance...to refine our faith...to discipline us...and more. But more often than not, our circumstances defy explanation, and God's ways remain unfathomable. But isn't this when the component of faith becomes operative? Look at Hebrews 11 and check to see if those listed in the Hall of Faith stepped out in trust even when they did not understand. Many of the things that happen in our lives are not tagged with an explanation as to why they are happening. Maybe God one day will take that box and say, "Let me show you My purpose in this event or this trial in your life in 2009, but if not, and meanwhile, we continue to walk by faith.

Medical update: Bilirubin levels are still way too high, and we did not get to finish radiation today due to ice. Thursday should be the last treatment, followed by a scope to look down my esophagus and investigate the cause of the severe pain. Strep tests were negative.

Blog On Pause - Sort Of

I'll start with the medical news tonight. Weather permitting and God willing I have one more radiology treatment tomorrow. My oncologist has recommended that later in the day I transfer to a hospital in Ft. Worth where an endoscopy can see whether I have any blockages in certain pathways that don't allow the bilirubin levels to come down. I covet your prayers for this procedure, as well as the dry mouth condition which continues. My inability to eat has been complicated by the addition of a severe sore throat. They have also discovered an irregular rhythm in my heart which they need to investigate further. I am greatly appreciative for doctors and drugs and technology, but realize my ultimate healer is the Lord. Please pray Psalm 40:11 on my behalf: "You, O Lord, will not withhold Your compassion from me; Your lovingkindness and Your truth will continually preserve me."

Separating Fact From Fiction

Years ago I remember reading a book on the life of Joseph called "From the Pit to the Pinnacle." Sometimes you feel like you've been in the pit a long time. In my situation as a hospital patient results are long in coming, the days are long in passing and sometimes the Lord's presence seems distant, removed, or negligible. I was encouraged today to read from Genesis 28:15 when God spoke to Jacob in a dream (even with a stone as a pillow), "I am with you and will keep you wherever you go." Later in the book we read Joseph was falsely accused, but "the Lord was with Joseph and extended kindness to him." (Genesis 39:21) If you are tempted like I have been to think that the Lord has withdrawn, come back to the pages of Scripture for an adjustment in truth and reality. Our situation, our feelings, our doubts, may cause us to think otherwise, but the Lord is with us even if it doesn't feel like it. Jesus Himself said, "I will never leave you nor forsake you." These are comforting words for challenging days.

Medical update: The specialists are in ongoing discussions as to the cause of the high bilirubin and the appropriate plan of action. The count has not come down noticeably. The last two radiation treatments will be Tuesday and Wednesday if not prevented by the expected ice storm. Please pray for God's timing in leaving here, and for agreement as to the best treatment.

Praying For Him Despite Our Differences

Paul writes in I Timothy 2:1, "First of all, then, I urge that entreaties and prayers, petitions and thanksgivings be made on behalf of all men, for kings and all those that are in authority, so that we may lead a tranquil and quiet life in all godliness and dignity." I was not able to take in any of the inaugural festivities, due to matters here in the hospital. This will not keep me, however, from praying for President Obama, and I urge you to do as much. One of the best reasons to do so is because we are exhorted to this task by the Lord Jesus Christ in His Word. Second, the decisions that he makes will ultimately have ramifications for us. Third, because the passage highlights those who are in authority, it would seem to indicate something of a spiritual battle is taking place beyond the oval office. We want our president and our government to enact laws and establish justice on the basis of moral principles derived from God's Word. By God's grace, I will lift President Obama before the throne of grace on a daily basis. I am sure we will each maintain separate positions on the moral issues. Nonetheless, I want God to guide our nation even if His hand is unrecognized by the president and those around him.

Medical update: After seeing the oncologist this evening, she is not satisfied with the diagnosis on my liver, and will be consulting with the specialist Monday to determine our further course of action. Three radiation treatments remain, so by God's grace, they will be complete Wednesday, and we will be able to say, "That is DONE!" Please pray for the liver results to be more clear, for healing of the dry mouth condition, and that I will be able to eat. I cannot be released until I can support myself with enough nutrition daily.

Unrestrained Praise

For the longest time after I came to faith in Christ, my worship was reserved (half-hearted), polite, and detached. Anybody around me that raised their hands a lot, whether for clapping or only raised high in the air, was viewed as something close to an extremist or simply as an over-emotional person. From now on, I'm taking my orders and fulfilling my desire through the exhortation of the psalmist who instructs us "Clap your hands all peoples, shout to God with a voice of joy." (Psalm 47:1) We all need to forget what others may think about us and bring "worthship" to God with our voices, our raised hands, clapping hands and yielded heart. True worship needs to be free and spontaneous, not scripted and restrained. So next time you see someone truly celebrating God's Person and His deeds in our worship service by use of their hands, don't give them a puzzled look, encourage them. Maybe the rest of us will be ignited by their flame.

Medical update: Radiation has taken its toll on my red and white blood count. I will be receiving some blood this evening. They will have to have a restraining order to keep me from reaching home next week!

Hearts as Big as the State of Texas

My reading today was from a small book, comparatively speaking, in the N.T. There is a slim cast of characters, but quite an interesting drama. Onesimus, a slave, has run away from his master, Philemon, a man of means, and apparently crossed paths with the Apostle Paul, through whom he embraced the gospel. Paul wants to be a bridge to reconnect the two men. Love is all over the pages of this short epistle.
1. Paul has heard of Philemon's love for the Lord and all the saints.
2. Paul's love is evident in his entire approach to a touchy situation.
3. Not wanting to use apostolic authority, he uses gracious appeal to Philemon to accept Onesimus back.
4. The love of Onesimus is demonstrated in that he brought refreshment to the hearts of all the saints.
5. The last indication of love is Paul's willingness to incur any expense that Philemon might be out for the period in which he was a fugitive.
I am certain that as you read this very short epistle you will sense and detect, like I did, how love reveals itself in concrete ways. Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, Who paid in full the great cost of our own personal sin. May the love of Christ be the springboard from which our words and works proceed.

Medical news: We finally received some words of encouragement today. Results of the liver biopsy indicate a high probability that medications were at fault. The doctor believes we were able to catch it in time, and no permanent damage will be done. He is unable to say how long it will take to reverse, but we should begin to see improvement eventually. Even though bilirubin levels remain elevated, it should not prevent us from being able to head home once radiation is completed next week.

The Christian's Motto - "We Aim To Please"

The Scriptures commonly condemn "men-pleasers," while we are commanded to be God-
pleasers. (I Thess. 4:1) You can see in various households certain children who seem eager to please their parents by prompt compliance to directives, by carrying out tasks with a positive attitude, and an overall satisfaction that submission to authority is a positive thing. I wanted to supply you this evening with some additional ways the Bible says we as children may please our Heavenly Father (List compiled by David Hocking):

1. By exalting Jesus Christ, His Son (Matt. 3:17; Col. 1:15-19)

2. By proclaiming the message of the cross (I Cor. 1:18-2:5)

3. By believing in God and his promises (Heb. 11:6)

4. By asking for wisdom (1 Kings 3:10, Col. 1:9-14; James 1:5-8)

5. By staying away from sexual sin (Eph. 5:3,4,10; 1 Thess. 4:1-8)

6. By sharing the gospel with unbelievers (I Cor. 9:14-27, 10:31-33)

7. By giving to others in time of need (Phil. 4:10-20; Heb. 13:16)

8. By submitting to authority (Rom. 8:7-8, Col. 3:20; 1 John 3:22)

9. By praising God for all things (Ps. 69:30-31; Heb. 13:15-16)

The Scriptures say we must become as children to enter the Kingdom of God. Better yet, why not become as children who are eager to please the Heavenly Father.


Health Update: bilirubin continued to rise, while strength decreases. There is much pain from the biopsy, making it difficult to breath. Additional testing is scheduled for Friday.

Praise: Always in Season for Hundreds of Reasons

The Psalmist in Psalm 145 rallies his whole being to vigilance as it pertains to praising the Lord. I would imagine that if we spent more time focused on His perfections and excellent attributes it would have a tremendous effect in shaping our own perspective on ourselves and what we are currently going through. Spend some time re-reading this majestic Psalm, and with paper and pen close by, enumerate all the reasons why David is so determined to make praising the Lord his primary occupation. With each successive day, add something to the list. Before long you will discover that there are infinite reasons to praise Him, because He is an infinite God. This will also eliminate a number of more trivial things that currently take up your time and attention. Praise is always in season and appropriate for hundreds of reasons.

Today was a busy day in the hospital, with the completion of another radiation treatment, an EEG to determine if there is any seizure activity, and a liver biopsy. Doctors are still scratching their heads as to the cause of the bilirubin elevation.

Somebody Pinch Me Please

The phone calls rolled in like the waves of a gentle surf. One of my boys shared how an investor came on board with his company to the tune of nearly 12 million dollars. Another boy called and was excited to be selected to do some artwork for the Jacksonville Zoo. Our 5th grade girl called, reporting of straight A's on her report card. Parents long to hear of their children's success and progress. The greatest phone call that a Christian parent could receive is found in the short epistle of Third John, where the beloved disciple writes, "I have no greater joy than this, to hear of my children walking in the truth." Just prior to this he spoke of the substance of his prayer for his children, "I pray that in all respects you prosper and be in good health, just as your soul prospers. For I was very glad when brethren came and testified to your truth, that is, how you are walking in the truth." We all want to see our children become successful and prosperous in multiple areas. But the bottom line for me as a parent and as a pastor is to know that "my children" are walking in the truth. When I hear that they are, my joy is off the charts and my mouth says, "Somebody pinch me please."

Please pray that God will make clear to the physicians treating me why my bilirubin count is so elevated. Even after radiation is completed, they do not wish to send home a patient with questionable liver function.

MEFC's Many Ministers

It is possible for guests, when they attend our church service, to conclude that MEFC has three ministers. They may have looked at the graphics on the door or the Sunday a.m. bulletin, or just asked around. The truth is that MEFC has over 300 ministers. Not salaried, not full-time, but ministers none the less. The three that are full-time pastors are essentially "equippers." The term equippers was used of the disciples as they "repaired" their nets to return to the task. As an equipper, we are to assist the 300+ "gifted" ministers build up the body of Christ. Whoa! What a role you play in your giving, your acts of mercy, your teaching, your serving, and much more. Check out Romans 12, I Corinthians 12, Ephesians 3, I Peter 4:10-11, where the lists of gifts are recorded, and see which one matches your desire to employ it to serve others. The next time someone asks you, "How many ministers does MEFC have?" you can truthfully say, "Over 300!" Now get busy.

Health note: I have 7 days of radiology remaining. By God's grace, I will be on a plane that final day, along with the love of my life. I am still in Medical City Hospital as they try to solve the mystery of an elevated bilirubin count.

New Heaven - New Earth - Just Ahead

Can you imagine driving down the interstate and seeing these words, "New Heaven - New Earth - Just Ahead" posted on a sign off the shoulder of the road? These are among the most encouraging words of Scripture, found in Rev. 21:1-6. They are so encouraging because of the "no mores" (what is excluded) and the "lots mores" (what is included) in the new heavens and new earth. With great anticipation we can look forward to breathtaking brilliance, breathtaking beauty, and the Bridegroom's presence (mentioned two times in verse 3). The things that are excluded include death, mourning, crying and pain, as we read that the first things have passed away. I hope that you continue to hold things loosely down here as we anticipate the new things there...not just beauty, not just brilliance, but the Bridegroom who loved us and gave Himself for us (Eph. 5:25), and whose presence will never leave us. No wonder Paul wrote to believers to set their minds on things that are above. I trust that you are doing so with each passing day.

My radiation treatments, of which I have eight remaining, resume Monday. We have not been dismissed from the hospital yet, but were able to obtain permission to leave for an hour. CT scan results were encouraging in that they did not see any clear difficulty, so no surgery is being scheduled. Please pray for improvement in ongoing tests.

Solution to Self Pity

God has a way of quickly terminating self pity, when you think your personal troubles are at the summit and exceed everyone else's. My own troubles have a different perspective because I have looked through the lenses of a friend of the Svoboda family, Jan Wheeler (multiple severe health problems); through the many surgeries of the Rowe children; through the woman who suffered twelve years from a hemorrhage (Mark 6:26). I used to, with tongue in cheek, state that this verse was a current commentary on our own medical community, for it states that she had suffered much at the hands of many physicians, and had spent all that she had, and was not helped at all, but rather had grown worse. But the point of the story is centered on her faith and the Great Physician, as she reached out to touch His garment. He is still the Great Physician and my faith awaits His reaching out and touching me, and healing me.

Please pray that my bilirubin level and other high levels of enzymes will normalize. We had an unexpected CT scan today and hope that it supplies the physician with precise knowledge of how to proceed.

Beauty and Beyond

The wisest man who ever lived, and the wealthiest in his day, knew from observation and experience some things were extremely rare. He wasn't talking about fine art, unique jewelry, or exceptional coins. He was speaking of that rare find of an excellent wife. The rhetorical question that Proverbs 31 begins with serves primarily to emphasize you may be looking a long time. Solomon points out that her value will be far above jewels. He doesn't say above the price of jewels, or just above the price of jewels, but far above the price of jewels. In other words, she is priceless. Thirty years ago come August the woman that Solomon speaks of was brought face to face with me, and I can't claim any credit for finding her. By God's grace I will have another thirty years with her. While time and space don't permit me to elaborate on the whole passage or provide illustrations of how my "treasure" fits these verses, let me just underscore verse 11, which states that the "heart of her husband trusts her." Verse 30 states that "many daughters have done nobly but you excel them all." I can see Solomon and myself going head to head over whose rare find came out on top. I think that I did. The Lord already knew that I felt this way about His gift to me. I just wanted you to know also. (Let me say congratulations to my brother-in-law Mike who marks his own rare find 25 years ago this week.)

Continue to pray that my liver enzyme count comes down. I am happy to have completed the first round of chemotherapy.

What Time Is It?

8 o'clock...9 o'clock...10 o'clock...we're waiting for the MRI that is scheduled for 11 a.m. No food or water again. A CT scan to follow...no food or water before that either. 11 o'clock... 12 o'clock...1 o'clock. Still no MRI. We got bumped down on the schedule by someone that came in to ER. Then we'll wait for the doctor to get the report, and wait for the consultation with her. The waiting game is exhausting and nerve-wracking. You know what I mean, because you've been in that "waiting room" before, haven't you? As I was reading Psalm 25 this morning, verse 5 jumped right off the page. "Lead me in your truth and teach me, for You are the God of my salvation; FOR YOU I WAIT ALL THE DAY." No wonder this is so exhausting - I'm waiting on the wrong thing. I'm waiting on tests and reports and doctors. God invites me to wait on Him instead.

I have to ask myself - what's the difference? The clock ticks at the same speed either way. How will the change in focus affect me? The answer soon became obvious. As I wait on tests and reports and man I am anxious. (Will they be late again? Will it be bad news? How much longer?) In contrast, Psalm 27:14 says, "Wait for the Lord; Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for the Lord." When waiting on the Lord we don't develop fear, but strength and courage. He won't be late, He will be enough, He has it all under His mighty hand.

Tonight we're still waiting. The reports are not in, the mysteries are still unsolved. Again tomorrow we'll wait...this time on the Lord. It won't come naturally.

Job's Friends?? (An oxymoron?)

I cannot imagine enduring a hard and lengthy trial without the comfort and encouragement of friends, especially our friends back in McCook, Nebraska. So it strikes me funny how Job had a different perspective of his companions. They must have been close at one time, but as the book unfolds they have become repetitious - "I have heard many such things" (16:1). They have become thoughtless - "There is no limit to empty words" (16:2). We do know from the reading of the book that they were certainly contentious. What is Job's conclusion? "Sorry comforters are you all!" (16:2). While comfort often involves the use of words, I have often thought Job's friends would have rendered him a greater service by their quiet presence than their verbal jousting. Can we remember that simply in our showing up when our friends are hurting we show our love and care and concern? I thank all of you who have written notes on your cards, for choosing and using the right words to minister God's grace to us. They are like "apples of gold in settings of silver" (Prov. 25:11) whatever that means, but it must be pretty! It is obviously impractical for most of you to be here physically, but so many have found a way to "show up" through a card, e-mail, gift, or phone call. You all are sensational comforters!

We are awaiting the results of a liver test. Pray that this will be a positive report. Lungs seem to be functioning better. We are hoping to resume radiology on Monday.

High Octane Worship

I often wonder when I think of how the angels in heaven worship our great God, if He doesn't think that our worship is rather feeble. Four times in Scripture we read about the beauty of His holiness: I Chronicles 16:29, 2 Chronicles 20:21, Psalm 29:2, Psalm 96:9. When we read about His holiness it is typically repeated three times, "Holy, holy, holy" (Isaiah 6). This is the Hebrew writer's way of expressing a superlative. In the English language we use the terms good, better, best. We often say, "That was the best piece of pie I have ever eaten." We might get asked, "Even better than the last one that I made?" When the authors of Scripture wanted to make a strong point, it was through repetition. So think about this phrase as it refers to our God: the beauty of His holiness. Beauty is something that commands and invites attention. Sometimes it might even be flawless. That is the great thing about the infinite God that we worship - He is majestic and beautiful in holiness and we could learn something from the angelic creation by affirming it constantly and maintaining the correct posture while doing so. I am convinced that God wants us to see and enjoy His superlative beauty.

In respect to health, please pray for continued stamina and a good outcome for a liver test tomorrow. Join us in thanking God that I am out of ICU and into a private room.

Are You Hungry?

With the acquisition of pneumonia there has been a suspension of physical appetite. I have very little interest in eating, no matter what is on the tray they set before me. There are times I want to say, "Don't even take the lid off - just take it back to the kitchen." It reminds me of an illustration that Howard Hendricks used to share in his class on Bible Study Methods. He said, "Show me a baby with no appetite and I'll show you a sick baby." He quickly transferred this metaphor into a spiritual lesson. Jesus said in Matthew 5:6, "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness for they shall be satisfied." I never could really understand how believers could keep from craving the Word of God, the knowledge of the Most High, the participation in a banquet of truth. The Beatitudes affirm both blessing and satisfaction to the one who has the strong appetite for the things of God. I believe that the greatest enjoyment in having the strong appetite for the things of God is to have His presence at the banquet table with us. "O taste and see that the Lord is good" and then watch your appetite grow from there.

Medical news - treatment for pneumonia continues in ICU and we hope it is soon completed so we can resume radiology. Test results were encouraging - I am getting better! We hope to move to a regular room tomorrow, and the doctor said I will be there the rest of the week. This does postpone our return to the end of the month.

Please pray for MEFC's participants in the Holy Land trip that starts tomorrow and goes for the next 10 days.

Summary

If asked to summarize my time here in one word, I've been thinking what that would be. The first one would be grace. The other (more human) terms might be lengthy, or fearful. But if I could do it in one verse, I would select this stanza:
Through many dangers, toils and snares I have already come;
Tis grace hath brought me safe thus far and grace will lead me home.

If you haven't yet, please you-tube Phillips, Craig and Dean, "His Grace Still Amazes Me."

Yours because of His infinite, matchless grace,
Chris

Chris sends this from ICU:
In the time before a procedure, when they do not allow you to have food and water, my thirst becomes so intense it becomes nearly unbearable. This quickly takes me to the passage where Jesus cries out "I thirst." We should translate our experiences to biblical meditations. It made me realize how great His thirst must have been during His passion (sufferings), all to give us the freeness, the fullness, the satisfaction of living water. The Psalmist also speaks of the depths of His sufferings in these words which relate to thirst: "My strength is dried up like a potsherd, and my tongue cleaves to My jaws." (Psalm 22:15) Just as Jesus invited the Samaritan woman to experience the living water, the body of Christ must continue that task. That is why we remain here on planet earth, as well as to give Him praise for so great a salvation.

I am requesting friends that read my blog to pray for my many friends taking the trip to Israel on the 13th. Although it was my intent to conduct the trip, I will join you in requesting journey mercies and the Lord's watch care.

Today I had an echo cardiogram and a scope of my lungs, and we are awaiting results from each. Antibiotics have assisted in freer breathing.

A Good Day

Chris asked me to give you a medical update on his behalf. He really has not had a good night's rest since the blood clot incident, but last night was particularly difficult. He woke up with severe nausea, the first since starting treatment, and had fever, shortness of breath, and general misery. We had an appointment for blood work today (which again was OK), but the doctor was concerned about his symptoms, particularly the very low oxygen count, so sent us directly to ER. At this point he has been diagnosed with pneumonia, but they are going to continue testing as to the type, and hope to rule out anything heart related. He is presently in intensive care awaiting a scope of his lungs for further diagnosis. He asks your prayers that the antibiotic will take effect quickly, and that he will be able to rest. He describes himself as "battle worn," as you can imagine, from the seriousness of the condition and treatments to the lack of rest.

Our conversation in the evening often ends with "This was a good day!" That usually means there were no new catastrophes! Things went according to plan, we enjoyed each other, our meals, and being able to check another treatment off the calendar. Have you ever thought about what makes a good day? In I Peter 1:6 we are told, "In this you GREATLY REJOICE, even though now for a little while, if necessary, you have been distressed by various trials..." In meditating on this passage this week I am challenged that the great rejoicing is not when the trial is over - it's during the trial. Why? We don't always remember this, but it is because of the greatness of our inheritance reserved in heaven, and the proof of our faith that will result in praise and glory and honor for the Lord someday. A good day doesn't have to depend on good circumstances or absence of pain. I don't have to measure this day in terms of the present difficulty, I can choose to measure it by future glory, or the delightful presence of the Lord right now. Today my precious husband is in ICU, awaiting further testing, and it feels like a definite setback. But the truth is, it was a good day, because we experienced God's presence, His peace and comfort, His love, and His power working in us. Did you have a good day?

Thinking Outside the Box (Yourself)

In my quiet time this morning, I was reminded of one of the believer's subtle and restless enemies - the flesh. Paul writes, "Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves." (Phil. 2:3) This enemy is not something that can be remedied through nearby doctors or special medication. I have discovered that with my medical condition and the length of time we've been on the healing path, I've had time to refine my own tendency toward self interest and excuse it away too. The thermostat should be placed at the temperature I desire. The ice chips in my hospital cup must be at a certain level. If I'm more comfortable at night with a light on, it must stay on. Where we eat breakfast, lunch or dinner can be decided by me on a whim. If I need the computer or the cell phone at a certain time, then because of "my condition" I gain an edge over these items. Over the years, we've all heard people say, "If I don't look out for #1 (meaning themselves) no one else will." Actually Jesus Christ was completely devoid of seeking His own interests, and the Spirit-filled believer, in the same fashion, will not regard his own interests more important than others, but has other people's concerns and cares high on the list of prayer and assistance. If you need two solid examples of this type of humility and divestment of self interest, you need to only look as far as Jesus Christ (Phil. 2:5-8) and Timothy (Phil. 2:20). May the Spirit of God that indwells us also humble us and cause us to yield to the Word and the admonition here to think outside of the box (ourselves).

Medical update: 8 radiology treatments left, and an oncologist in North Platte who travels to McCook has been referred. I attended an early lecture this morning by Dr. Kenneth Cooper, founder of the Cooper Aerobics Center and who was "tapped" one time by President Bush for the office of surgeon general. He was an encyclopedia of knowledge on nutrition, exercise, heart and body health, and much more. He is a man of faith who attends Prestonwood Baptist Church, and very gracious in answering questions as they relate to nutrition for someone on chemotherapy. Just a footnote - Americans need terribly to raise their level of Vitamin D and Omega 3's. Regarding servings of fruits and veggies he stated quite memorably, "5 servings a day is fine, but 9 is divine." Thank you for reading these ramblings.

Our love to you - Chris and Eunice

Table Top (Radiology) Prayer

In my daily radiology treatments I send a prayer to God based on Colossians 1:15, "For by Him all things were created, both in heaven and earth, visible and invisible." My invisible spirit and soul were created by Him, and my increasingly visible body, and thousands upon thousands of invisible cells that make up my body. My simple prayer to God during treatment is that He would direct these invisible beams of light to every cell in my brain that is harmful or counterproductive to good health. I pray that God would cause the treatment to eliminate, destroy, and eradicate any and all cancer cells that would subvert the purpose for which I was created...to love...serve...and glorify Him. As you continue to pray for me, this would be a specific way in which our great God could apply His great power to a specific need.

We were greeted with a surprise ice storm yesterday that knocked out the power to 48,000 homes, including the Lodge where we are staying. After several hours, we packed up to go to my sister's home for the night. The power outage also kept me from adding to the blog, which I love to do. In our treatment countdown, only 9 remain, and 8 days of chemotherapy. Both radiology and chemo have begun to sap me of energy and increase my fatigue level. Please add this concern to your prayers.

Bargain Souvenirs and Buckets of Praise

Continued medical treatment keeps me from participating in a Holy Land trip that I organized and that will be leaving shortly. I read an article on how members of the trip could bring home an inexpensive souvenir. There is a stopping point for tourists near the Mt. of Olives, which is popular for a group photo or camel ride and near this spot our Lord passed by on a lowly burrow. The writer suggests that you pocket an ordinary stone to take home, and display it with a note that says, "One of the stones that didn't cry out." This is in reference to Luke 19:35-40 and is referred to as the Triumphant Entry of Jesus into Jerusalem. Jesus was told to rebuke His disciples as they shouted the words from Psalm 118 (though they left out verse 22, which reads, "The stone which the builders rejected has become the chief cornerstone.") Most of the Pharisees were frustrated with this display of praise and were wanting Jesus to tone down the crowd, essentially saying "These men are calling you the king of Israel." Jesus approved their words and accepted their praise, adding that if His followers became silent, the very stones would cry out. So pilgrims, collect your stone, and offer Him buckets of praise, because that is what all of creation does (i.e. sun, moon, stars, waters, mountains, cedars, fruit trees, fire, snow, clouds - Psalm 148).

We look forward to seeing you soon, but in the meantime, and the in-between time, offer Jesus your wholehearted, full-throated praise, for He is supremely worth of it all.

How to Pray and Not Lose Heart

My path literally crossed with a lawyer's today. In our visit he made a jab at his own profession. He said a doctor and a lawyer simultaneously fell into a shark tank, but the attorney was left alone due to professional courtesy! There is a parable found in Luke 18 about a judge who exhibits shark-like sensitivity to a widow in need. He is a hard-boiled, self-centered, unsympathetic old codger who contrasts vividly with our caring Heavenly Father. Unlike the unsympathetic judge, our Heavenly Father does not turn a deaf ear to our prayer requests. He does not drag His heels. Our glorious God requires no picket lines, pestering or harassment. We should not lose heart in prayer when we realize that it is laying hold of the eagerness of God to help and bless us. Matthew's gospel succinctly reminds us, "Ask, and it shall be given to you; seek, and you shall find; knock, and it shall be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it shall be opened." In verse 11 we read, "If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your Father who is in heaven give what is good to those who ask Him!" May the assurance of these verses cause you to continue in prayer and not lose heart.

To Be or Not To Be...Useful, Fruitful, Faithful

John Bunyan wrote what is regarded as one of the most significant works in literature years ago, and that book, Pilgrim's Progress, is published and read unto this day. PROGRESS is what the Christian life is all about, while avoiding the things which entangle us (2 Tim. 2:4), the sins which beset us (Heb. 12:1), and the cares that distract us (Matt. 6:25). Following salvation many believers seem to select a button that puts the Christian life on auto-pilot (passivity). It would be more preferable to use the manual controls (diligent activity) and have a work out plan routinely scheduled. Peter encourages this last approach where he exhorts us to add to our faith, knowledge, to our knowledge, self-control, to self-control, perseverance, and onto that godliness, brotherly-kindness and love (2 Peter 1:6-11). Adding these qualities to your faith insures us that we will be useful (vs. 8), fruitful (vs. 8), and faithful (vs. 10). One added bonus is the plentiful entrance into the kingdom of our Lord. What will it be for you? Auto-pilot (passivity) or diligent activity? Please keep up the good PROGRESS and momentum.

Frequently I am asked how I am feeling, so let me be candid. The path is long, the hurdles at times are high, yet His grace is sufficient, His presence is near and His love is never ending. Our goal remains unchanged, which is to be home just after the middle of January. Out of 30 radiation treatments, I have 11 left, and 12 days of chemotherapy left. I am hoping to continue my chemotherapy in Nebraska under a neuro oncologist supervised by my doctor here. James Taylor, Jim Ladd and I will be sharing similar hairstyles, or the lack thereof!

Beauty, Majesty and Glory Up Close

Since our little Bethany has been in Dallas for over a week, she has patiently sat in doctor's offices during several of my treatments, sometimes for hours. We decided to do something special for her on New Year's Day, so Eunice drove us all to the Dallas World Aquarium. Although my antennae don't receive all the signals clearly, the beauty and majesty of our God and His handiwork were clearly on display. Paul states in Romans, that the invisible things of God, namely His power and His deity, are clearly evident through His creation. So from penguin to pelican, piranha to anaconda, otters to owls, myna to manatee, stork to stingray, tortoise to toucan, we marvelled at the variety, the creativity, the beauty, the individuality, i.e., the handiwork of God. Indeed, all of nature is an eloquent symphony to His glory.